You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
I gave the guy a $20 tip on a $9 cab ride, he thought I was just bad at math but I was really just incredibly thankful to be alive and home.
I was like "don't worry, I'm a math major and you deserve the shit out of that 222% tip"
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
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