she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
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Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
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Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
that is very illegal...i love you.
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