these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
Randomize
