I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
and then I drunkenly screamed, "you can ride that Uber all the way to revenge city!"
which was funny until I realized I paid for my enemy's cab to go fuck my ex
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
Randomize
