I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize