i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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