Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
Randomize
