I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
Randomize
