Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
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