Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
Randomize
