Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Randomize
