so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
Why can't burritos get me drunk
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Randomize
