Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize