Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
Randomize
