We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
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