Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(540): View more from Virginia

Whore.

(832): View more from Houston, Texas

I was being facetious

(540): View more from Virginia

Don't try to hide behind big words.

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(540): Whore. (832): I was being facetious (540): Don't try to hide behind big words. http://tfl.nu/w180

Replies (2) Good night (2183) Bad night (705)
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(253): View more from Washington

I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.

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(253): I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then. http://tfl.nu/hci4

Replies (9) Good night (2322) Bad night (603)
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(302): View more from Delaware

is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?

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(302): is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"? http://tfl.nu/82yu

Replies (13) Good night (2777) Bad night (999)
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(972): View more from Texas

90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina

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(972): 90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina http://tfl.nu/4hnn

Replies (7) Good night (952) Bad night (3406)
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(205): View more from Alabama

Why are my keys in the refrigerator?

(1-205): View more from Alabama

You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.

(205): View more from Alabama

This explains so much.

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(205): Why are my keys in the refrigerator? (1-205): You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you. (205): This explains so much. http://tfl.nu/ouwy

Replies (30) Good night (18510) Bad night (1184)
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(219): View more from Indiana

she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'

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(219): she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs' http://tfl.nu/aa98

Replies (38) Good night (1414) Bad night (17455)
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(978): View more from Massachusetts

i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months

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(978): i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months http://tfl.nu/y63w

Replies (20) Good night (4411) Bad night (1305)
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(850): View more from Florida

I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.

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(850): I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain. http://tfl.nu/8aml

Replies (12) Good night (5754) Bad night (1206)
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(217): View more from Illinois

The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left

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(217): The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left http://tfl.nu/fjkf

Replies (15) Good night (2347) Bad night (1134)
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(402): View more from Nebraska

I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.

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(402): I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange. http://tfl.nu/kq15

Replies (3) Good night (3403) Bad night (1249)
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(515): View more from Iowa

I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.

(515): View more from Iowa

I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.

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(515): I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared. (515): I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong. http://tfl.nu/g00k

Replies (4) Good night (2107) Bad night (712)
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(770): View more from Georgia

You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."

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(770): You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt." http://tfl.nu/x17b

Replies (8) Good night (1434) Bad night (578)
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(626): View more from California

AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN

(1-626): View more from California

we're fated to lesbian

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(626): AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN (1-626): we're fated to lesbian http://tfl.nu/bohp

Replies (5) Good night (1274) Bad night (638)
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(585): View more from New York

S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.

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(585): S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding. http://tfl.nu/j7eu

Replies (1) Good night (596) Bad night (1096)
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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money

(412): View more from Pennsylvania

I swear to god those aren't related

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(724): Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money (412): I swear to god those aren't related http://tfl.nu/w3tr

Replies (2) Good night (753) Bad night (307)

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