just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
Randomize
