My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
