He is such a slut. More and more my type.
Just heard someone use the phrase "slut mustard" in a sentence. Win.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
Randomize