ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
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He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
This is my gift to your gina
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I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
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