Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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Sorry mike_honcho hasn't picked any favorites yet.

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(216): View more from Ohio

dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."

(814): View more from Pennsylvania

so im guessing thats a no.....

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(303): View more from Colorado

Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.

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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even

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(406): View more from Montana

I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN

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(760): View more from California

I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.

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