Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
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