At least make sure they are 18
Why
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
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