I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
We need to rekindle our bromance
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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