Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
please come you make the beer taste better
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
Randomize
