yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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