There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
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