you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Randomize
