before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
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