Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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