you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
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