I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Randomize
