Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize