that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
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