Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize