shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
FUCK WHALES
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
Randomize
