Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
