how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
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