i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
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