Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
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