writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize