four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
Randomize
