Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (318): View more from Louisiana

  That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (318): That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch http://tfl.nu/faw2
  Replies (4) Good night (1168) Bad night (446) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (214): Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again. http://tfl.nu/sc3c
  Replies (5) Good night (1387) Bad night (392) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (713): View more from Texas

  i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (713): i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better http://tfl.nu/apc9
  Replies (3) Good night (687) Bad night (2125) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (226): View more from Ontario

  forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (226): forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions. http://tfl.nu/kw3s
  Replies (15) Good night (7647) Bad night (885) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (603): you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics. http://tfl.nu/re5j
  Replies (21) Good night (8013) Bad night (578) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (619): You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything http://tfl.nu/13bs
  Replies (49) Good night (713) Bad night (6238) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (519): View more from Ontario

  my dad just said 'either you're lying about your plans tonight or you kids are really lame nowadays'. maybe we should nix the singles saturday slumber party and go to a bar.

  (1-519): View more from Ontario

  You texted the wrong number but that's probably the best call you'll ever make.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (519): my dad just said 'either you're lying about your plans tonight or you kids are really lame nowadays'. maybe we should nix the singles saturday slumber party and go to a bar. (1-519): You texted the wrong number but that's probably the best call you'll ever make. http://tfl.nu/j6t1
  Replies (12) Good night (9902) Bad night (1068)
• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (518): I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone. http://tfl.nu/dcqd
  Replies (3) Good night (2493) Bad night (525) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  Top reasons to NOT leave jessica to her own devices : 1. Drinking becomes a competitive sport ( in which she is the only one competing) 2.big girl words= no worky 3. Whiskey refuses to be a good friend (as much as she insists ). 4. Waking up at six a.m. still in her swim suit is super awkward. 5. It isn't a fun game to figure out which person she gave her number to and 6. Yesterdays eyeliner doesn't look good today.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (512): Top reasons to NOT leave jessica to her own devices : 1. Drinking becomes a competitive sport ( in which she is the only one competing) 2.big girl words= no worky 3. Whiskey refuses to be a good friend (as much as she insists ). 4. Waking up at six a.m. still in her swim suit is super awkward. 5. It isn't a fun game to figure out which person she gave her number to and 6. Yesterdays eyeliner doesn't look good today. http://tfl.nu/tybk
  Replies (10) Good night (1357) Bad night (1845)
• Favorite

  (763): View more from Minnesota

  So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (763): So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life. http://tfl.nu/7aby
  Replies (28) Good night (562) Bad night (4829) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (781): do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents? http://tfl.nu/2gwr
  Replies (13) Good night (505) Bad night (1494) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (413): Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn http://tfl.nu/brfq
  Replies (8) Good night (574) Bad night (2090) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (773): View more from Illinois

  Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.

  (213): View more from California

  I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (773): Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA. (213): I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars. http://tfl.nu/q1ju
  Replies (15) Good night (1599) Bad night (461)
• Favorite

  (563): View more from Iowa

  I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (563): I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked. http://tfl.nu/l7dr
  Replies (7) Good night (1309) Bad night (378) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (760): View more from California

  The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (760): The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter http://tfl.nu/uanv
  Replies (6) Good night (863) Bad night (392) Order T-Shirt

Randomize