He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
