Texts From Last Night

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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."

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  (201): At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure." http://tfl.nu/vpnd
  Replies (42) Good night (5971) Bad night (670)
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  (408): View more from California

  hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner

  (1-408): View more from California

  if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends

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  (408): hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner (1-408): if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends http://tfl.nu/qgda
  Replies (29) Good night (4571) Bad night (920)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?

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  (703): why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall? http://tfl.nu/4ssb
  Replies (14) Good night (2151) Bad night (760)
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  (415): View more from California

  Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok

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  (415): Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok http://tfl.nu/rrpn
  Replies (37) Good night (7196) Bad night (895)
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  (817): View more from Texas

  At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.

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  (817): At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children. http://tfl.nu/trxp
  Replies (24) Good night (7966) Bad night (1107)
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  (505): View more from New Mexico

  You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night

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  (505): You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night http://tfl.nu/jwrk
  Replies (14) Good night (4534) Bad night (846)
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  (716): View more from New York

  i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.

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  (716): i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing. http://tfl.nu/i263
  Replies (10) Good night (3164) Bad night (830)
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  (094): View more from

  After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.

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  (094): After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while. http://tfl.nu/x4in
  Replies (3) Good night (2730) Bad night (872)
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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  He had a curved dick....must be a european thing

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  (401): He had a curved dick....must be a european thing http://tfl.nu/mrr2
  Replies (19) Good night (1222) Bad night (2319)
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  (940): View more from Texas

  Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?

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  (940): Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito? http://tfl.nu/3rt4
  Replies (11) Good night (2303) Bad night (504)
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  (415): View more from California

  I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".

  (415): View more from California

  good luck with that

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  (415): I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco". (415): good luck with that http://tfl.nu/41gz
  Replies (4) Good night (884) Bad night (939)
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  Congratulations on your lack of fetus.

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  (630): Congratulations on your lack of fetus. http://tfl.nu/ujd7
  Replies (4) Good night (1793) Bad night (790)
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  (740): View more from Ohio

  They shoved things up my nose I feel violated

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  (740): They shoved things up my nose I feel violated http://tfl.nu/ojlg
  Replies (11) Good night (433) Bad night (972)
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.

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  (978): I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping. http://tfl.nu/amws
  Replies (0) Good night (341) Bad night (171)
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  (907): View more from Alaska

  Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge

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  (907): Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge http://tfl.nu/scnb
  Replies (2) Good night (594) Bad night (226)

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