He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
We left an ass print on the piano.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
Randomize
