the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
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