my best friend tried to rape me with a pineapple
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
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