Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
