Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
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