I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
Randomize